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That’s the question I was asked by my psychologist on Monday (not Daisy) and this is something I have thought about before, but haven’t like sat with it you know?

I am a firm believer that everything happens for a reason and that people enter and exit our lives when it’s meant to be and for a reason.

I started all this social media business because I want to make a change and impact lives, even if it’s one. And once my psychologist asked me “how long do you want to be remembered and for what” I was like this, this is how I want to be remembered.

I want people to think of me as an average girl that wants to make a change, a girl that has beeeen through it but has worked on herself, a girl that radiates positivity and kindness. A girl that you can open up to and speak to without fear or judgement. I want to be that girl and so much more. And I want to be remembered as that for as long as possible.

And I know I can do it, and I want you to know that you can too. Life is hard and it throws us with so much stuff but it’s what we do with it that matters. Turn a negative into a positive, and don’t worry about how long that is going to take you, look forward to the destination.

Be grateful. I’ve been through some crap in my life and I used to cry and think why me? But it’s all happening for a reason, I am meant to tell a story and inspire others, to encourage others to hold on. Because let me tell you… life was very very dark a few months ago and I am so so happy that I held on, because now I see the light and the beauty in all things and I welcome challenges into my life because I know it will make me stronger.

My message to you today is to hold on. Please hold on. Whatever you are going through WILL get better, it must. Look at your life, reflect, and let go of what is holding you back… and it might be easy for me to say that, but trust me. Instead of looking at all the crappy things, look at the good and take it in and embrace it and hold onto it.

Life is crazy with it’s twists and turns but I believe in you, I believe that you will come out stronger and happier than ever. If you feel like you need someone to talk too, I am all ears.

Until next time my lovely souls, remember that you are loved!

xx

Trust me this all adds up in the end.

Where do I start? Okay, so since I was about 8 years old I have been battling with a “specific phobia” which I will NOT mention, as I do not want anyone to go through what I went through. VERY few people know about this fear, and if you do . . . thank you for always trying to put my mind at ease.

Anyway, the fear had to do with religion/God/faith. Something between those lines, I won’t get specific. Living with this fear was crippling, I shed so many tears, pulled out my hair and all the horrible things. A lot of the time I was convinced my mind would “break” if that makes sense. As you know I have many mental issues that I battle with, but this was by far the worst thing that I had to overcome.

I’ve spoken to therapists about this and none could help. . . Until I met Daisy. On the very first day when we were talking about what I need help with, I mentioned this specific phobia and her exact words were “Oh, don’t worry that is definitely something we can work on, don’t worry” For the first time in my life I had hope that maybe, just maybe I can close the door on that chapter.

Daisy and I had a few sessions, and we worked on everything that bothered me (well the main things) and we took a week break (we usually met every week on a Tuesday) because my husband had surgery. And we met this Tuesday, and we were like well what are we going to talk about today? and then she brought it up . . . the thing. And she asked if I am ready and I said yes. We spoke for 50 minutes in total, and by the end of the session I was in tears, those tears that stop you from breathing properly. BUT – it was happy tears. It was finally GONE! she shattered the fear, she gave me advice and for the first time in my life I felt complete peace over my body,

We spoke about God and the Bible, I had some questions which she could answer based on her beliefs and the fact that she had studied the Bible for many years. She advised me to read the Bible and start with the book of John, and we spoke about what a coincidence it is that this weekend is Good Friday and Easter. The Daily text for today is “Good Friday — For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, so that everyone who believes in him may not perish but may have eternal life. John 3:16” Also, the daily text for that day was “Tuesday, March 26, 2024 — Psalm 39:7–13
Exodus 31:12–32:29; Matthew 26:36–46 The Lord makes a way in the sea, a path in the mighty waters. Isaiah 43:16 Jesus said, “And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and will take you to myself, so that where I am, there you may be also. And you know the way to the place where I am going.” John 14:3-4. Later that day my husband and I were reading up on the history of his Church and we watched a video and it ended with “John 17:21 that they may all be one”. I’ll link the video below

Now, do you believe in fate? because I do. How crazy is it that we had this conversation this week and it all kind of relating to the book of John? It’s not just a coincidence. It can’t be.

I told Daisy how I prayed and prayed to God to take this fear away from me, as it was holding me back from many things, including becoming closer to God. I believe every step I have taken in my life has lead me to Daisy, and in turn lead me closer to God, and I am so very grateful for that.

Crazy how life works hey?

I don’t have an exact message for you to take away from this. . . other than the fact that everything happens for a reason, and things will get better. You just need to hold on. It will get better

May you have a blessed Good Friday and Easter weekend!

Until next time my lovely souls, remember that you are loved

xx

Sorry I’ve been MIA 🙁

Life has beeeen life-ing? Does that fit the “lingo”? LOL

Even though my husband just had surgery a week ago, and I’ve been recovering from a terrible flu, I am grateful.

I woke up happy and decided to go with it.

I know it may seem like life can come at you with so many things, and most of the time with everything at once – but trust me when I say, you can get through it. It won’t last forever, the sun has to shine at some point 🙂

Even when you are going through the most, ask yourself. . . “what am I grateful for?” I’ll tell you mine. I am grateful for a new day, a chance to make memories and laugh as hard as I can. I am grateful for my wonderful family, my husband and my pets. I am grateful for life and the fact that I am getting older (I used to fear aging, now I welcome it) I am grateful for feeling peaceful and happy.

I was looking at old video’s of my siblings and it brought so much happiness to my heart, I have had the privilege of watching them grow up and become their own person. Life moves by so fast, so always embrace the now.

I know I haven’t been posting much, and I haven’t been posting much about my mental health journey, but I will get to it. Bipolar Awareness day is coming up, and I’ll probably dedicate a post to it.

But for now, I want you to look at what is good in your life, even if it’s something as small as a great cup of coffee that you just had. Enjoy the good moments, embrace them and try and hold onto them, for when days that are not as good.

Thank you for reading. . .

Until next time my lovely souls, remember that you are loved.

xx

In your eyes, I find my solace, my dear, My partner, confidant, forever near. Your smile, a beacon, lights my way, Your laughter, a melody, bright as day.

Each morning, your hair, a playful chore, Yet in that moment, I love you more. “Angel,” you call me, with tender grace, In your embrace, I find my place.

Your heart, a treasure, pure as gold, Kindness and help, your virtues bold. Tomorrow, the next life, eternity’s span, It’s always been you, my beloved man.

In laughter, we find joy, in trials, strength, Together, we conquer, no matter the length. Your work, your mind, a marvel to behold, I may not grasp all, but your tales unfold.

Your love for others, a sight to see, Reflects the love you’ve shown to me. In your soul, I find my home, With you, my love, I’ll always roam.

I’ll support, encourage, through thick and thin, In your arms, my heart, it does begin. Know this, my love, in every hue, I love you endlessly, forever true.

Thank you for choosing me, for loving so, In your arms, my heart does glow. My dear husband, my cherished friend, Together, forever, until the end.

Don’t forget to tell those you love how much they mean to you

Until next time my lovely souls, remember you are loved

xx

I’ve made some changes. Okay, let’s be real for a second… I’ve made quite a few changes. And it all started with this blog. I am so grateful for this safe space where I can talk about what I want and just be me.

After I started the blog, I made a YouTube channel, Instagram & TikTok account and a Facebook page, I somehow ended up on Reddit too, but haven’t been very active on it. Anyway… It started with me wanting to create awareness about mental health and specifically bipolar disorder. It later branched out into my physical well being as well, and I’m glad it did.

I started intermittent fasting, started exercising, meditating, and generally just taking better care of myself. I have Daisy to thank for a lot of those things. Daisy made me realize that it’s okay to get excited about things and to make changes. (for some context I had a really bad manic episode in 2022 and I did a lot of stupid things that I now regret. I was on top of the world, full of energy, and then came crashing down so hard, so I was, you can say “scared” to let myself be happy because I didn’t want another manic episode) Anyway Daisy helped me understand my emotions and how to cope with them, same with my mood. Doing DBT therapy has changed my life.

I am so happy and at peace, yes there is a lot going on under the surface but I’m happy. I have a routine, I’m talking about how I feel without lashing out. I am becoming more confident in my body. I am making changes. I even posted some really scary things on TikTok, things that I usually wouldn’t. It’s like I didn’t want the world to see me, the fat girl. I didn’t want to be known as the fat girl. I was ashamed. But now I am holding myself accountable for my actions, being assertive of what I put into my body and how I take care of my body. I don’t care about being that fat girl anymore because that does NOT define me. I am not going to be scared of going out because of my appearance. Yes I’m overweight, what are you going to do about it? Laugh? Trash talk me? I DON’T CARE! I am making changes.

I am at my best mentally, I am getting to where I want to be physically and nothing is going to get in my way. So, come at me with whatever you want, I will still stand tall and strong, because that is who I am now. I am strong, I am the best version of me. Nothing, and I mean nothing is going to get me down.

Anyway, I want to encourage you to take that step, whatever it is, if it’s going to make you feel better about yourself, do it! Who cares what everyone else thinks? Want a supporter? I’ll be your supporter! You are strong, you are beautiful, you can do anything you put your mind to. Now go out there and do it.

Until next time my lovely souls, remember you are loved!

xx

Okay, that’s a bold statement to make right?

But honestly? I’ve done so much work on myself in the past month that I can say I am in a really good place right now with my mind.

Doing DBT therapy, exercising and doing intermittent fasting has all come together like a puzzle, a puzzle that has had pieces missing for years.

I just got off a call with my therapist, and we had some deep conversations, and part of me feels really sad, but a good kind of sad if that makes sense. For the first time I can identify my emotions and know how to deal with it.

Handling my emotions and controlling my mood has been something that I have struggled with for years, and to finally see the light is such a good feeling.

I am going to keep today’s post short because I just want to go and be present in what I am feeling in this moment, I want to process it and get through it in a healthy way, a way that I now know how to do.

Maybe I’ll make a post today or tomorrow going into detail on what I mean, but for now I want you to take a minute, take a deep breath, feel your lungs expand and embrace the smells around you, listen to the sound and feel the moment that you are in. Feel it deeply, and know that if you are going through a tough time, it won’t last forever, trust me. Here is a video I listened to this morning that I really enjoyed, and that helped me stay present in the moment.

Until next time my lovely souls, remember you are loved!

xx

Wow! I can’t believe that I haven’t posted in such a loooooong time! Time flies guys, it really does.

I don’t even remember my last post. BRB I’m going to see what I spoke about.

I’m baaaaccck! “I saw a new therapist, started intermittent fasting and had my sister over for the weekend” So that’s the just of my last post. Hmmm let’s see… what’s new?

Okay, so I am continuing with my new therapist Daisy, I LOVE HER! can I say that? Oh well. She has helped me so so much with my emotions, and how to handle stressful situations.

Let me insert something about the steps of DBT therapy quick fast.

So I feel like in the past 4 sessions that I have had with Daisy, we have covered all of this and let me tell you something… A few weeks ago I was so much in my head where I was questioning reality and I thought that nothing would help, but I was wrong. This has helped me. Yes, I still have my moments but honestly taking a deep breath and taking note of your surroundings really brings you back to reality!

So read up on DBT therapy and discuss those options with your therapist (if you have one) as I feel like it’s very effective in helping with ALOT of things.

Let’s move onto my intermittent fasting. Yes I am sticking to it. I took like a 2 day break because of shark week, but I’ll be back at it tomorrow. I am sticking to my workouts and I KNOW that this time around I will make the change and stick to it. I believe in myself and if you are battling with your weight, I believe in you too!

I feel like we need to motivate each other more. Hype each other up and be there for one another. A simple “you’ve got this” goes a long way. I had a complete stranger comment on one of my tik toks and it really made me smile, so thank you!

I wish I could make a change all on my own, wipe out all of the sadness and make others happy. Oh, I wish for so many things, but one can only do so much. So whatever you are working on and trying to do to better yourself… well done! thank you for making the world a better place!

Now, onto something funny. Guys I CANNOT do makeup, so check out my video below if you want a good laugh at how it goes south really really fast. I also talk about some random stuff that’s on my mind.

I will try my best to be more consistent with my posts, I have just been adjusting to a few things, but I’ll be back soooooon!

Until next time my lovely souls, remember that you are loved!

xx

I saw a new therapist, started intermittent fasting and had my sister over for the weekend.

xx

Nah I’m just kidding! Imagine that was the end? LOL

I’m taking a small break from the “mental health tips” I need it to flow and not be forced, so I’ll write when and how I feel inspired. In the meantime lets do a check in! How are you? How was your week? I hope you are doing well and that you had a productive and adventurous week, filled with lots of laughs!

So, last week Tuesday I saw a new psychologist – a lady! Now if you know me, you’ll know that I prefer male doctors. I just feel like I have a better connection with them. But let me tell you something – I clicked with her just like that! We had an amazing session and she already gave me homework LOL.

Yes, the initial session can be tough because a whole history has to be given, but if you can come out at the end smiling and having your feelings validated, then you know you have a match, and that’s how I felt.

I feel optimistic about this new journey. I’m doing something called DBT therapy (here’s a short description from google)

I struggle to regulate my mood and personality (among other things) at times, and that is why my previous psychologist recommended I see someone who specializes in this.

Seeing a therapist who you trust and who knows when something more is needed is great, and I am so very thankful to him. And I am so very thankful to my new therapist (let’s call her Daisy)

Daisy makes me feel comfortable and validated, I feel safe in her space and for that I am very greatful.

Let’s move on – for now. I started intermittent fasting with my husband and I’m down 2kg’s! Let’s insert a short description:

My OCD really comes in handy with stuff like this – because now I need to stick to times and things or it WILL BOTHER ME! I’ll share more about this as time goes on.

Now my sister. Ah I love my sister (hey I LOVE all my sibling equally!) My sister and I never got along in our younger years (we are 9 years apart) but we’ve grown closer and I am thankful for that. We share a lot more in common now, and talking to her is my other safe space. Love you sis! and love you too bro’s! (I have 2 brothers) Anyway, I won’t share too much about them, just the fact that I am very grateful for their presence in my life!

So I know you are probably wondering what is the point of this post! Well it’s to encourage you to step outside of your comfort zone every now and then, take on a new challenge, and don’t forget to tell those around you that you love and appreciate them.

I hope you enjoyed today’s post. May you have a wonderful and exciting week.

Until next time lovely souls – you are important, beautiful, wanted and most importantly, you are loved.

xx

tip number 10 – how a change of scenery can boost your mental health

“A place can give you profoundly positive emotions and remind you of some of your best times, or it can give you emotions and memories that cause you pain. The question “Is being here helping me or hurting me?” this may be valuable if you are making important changes in your life, especially if you are seeking treatment” – https://everlastrecovery.com

Studies suggest that a change of scenery can release feel-good hormones, expand your thinking, and inspire your mood.

I agree with this. Every now and then I get this urge to go somewhere new, even if it’s for an hour, even if it’s to my local park/gardens. In my experience a change of scenery has boosted my mood and made me feel more motivated than I was before.

My first choice is being with nature. I like to feel the warmth of the sun, the texture of the sand on my feet, and the sound of the wind blowing. I like engaging with nature and being as present as I can be in that moment. I love to see how the waves have their own little dance, and how amazing the world actually is. It’s a getaway, it’s like a breath of fresh air that I know my lungs were longing for.

If you are feeling stressed, unmotivated, or generally not yourself, I’d encourage you to take a step outside. Take a step into a new environment – (one that makes you happy!) and enjoy the moment. Take it in, every sound, every smell, take it in. Enjoy the moment and reset your mind and body.

I hope today’s tip is something that you can use in the future, as it is something that has helped me in the past.

Until next time lovely souls, you are important, beautiful, wanted and most importantly, you are loved.

xx

tip number 9 – how music can boost your mood

“Research has shown that blood flows more easily when music is played. It can also reduce heart rate, lower blood pressure, decrease cortisol (stress hormone) levels and increase serotonin and endorphin levels in the blood. It elevates mood. Music can boost the brain’s production of the hormone dopamine.” – https://www.northshore.org/

On days when my mind isn’t as clear as I’d like it to be, and when my thoughts seem to overflow… I like to listen to some music. The type of music I listen to changes all the time. I listen to pop, jazz, house, rnb, old school, rap, soft rock, and some classical music, to name a few.

I love music. Music transports me into a world where I feel safe and understood. I try and focus on the lyrics, the instruments/beats and I focus as hard as I can, and that relaxes me so much.

I feel like every song tells a story and I love stories, I love being transported into a new world where my thoughts are not in control. If you struggle with racing thoughts, anxiety and high stress levels, I would suggest listening to your favorite song, it might help 🙂

While listening to some of my favorite jams – I like to sing along, and I honesty don’t care how bad I sound. It’s a way of expressing myself. It makes me happy and that is something I will choose everyday.

I have a new favorite playlist that I made with some songs that I really enjoy. Some is sad, some relates to how I feel, and some motivate me. I have shared a link below, maybe you would like it too.

Today I want to encourage you to be you. Be your most authentic self and don’t apologize for it. Now – go listen to your favorite song and I hope it makes you smile and feel like you can take on the next challenge.

Until next time lovely souls, you are important, beautiful, wanted and most importantly, you are loved.

xx